Just a Quick Thank-You

And a quicker update on things. First, I want to extend further thanks to a few people. Dad, thanks for always being there. You are more important to the family and I than I think you realize. To Shirley G, Jacqueline V, and Mary W; thanks for the thoughts, messages, prayer cards and just plain being around. I know that I often fail to answer; but I have read everything, and it gives Robin and I great comfort.

Now, on with the show...

I was subjected to my third thoracentesis today--you may recall that they are scheduled weekly now--and even more fluid was pulled off this time! Today's total was 2850ml, or just shy of 3 litres. Oddly enough, when the Radiologist looked at my chest with the ultrasound machine she thought that there was "only" about 500 to 800ml to remove. So much for the trained eye... Or, maybe I just have a bloody big pleural cavity. Thank God for the years on the swim team, it seems to have given me some respiratory reserve.

Anyway, I was feeling pretty good before the tap--no shortness of breath at rest, and very little with exertion--but I guess I can just compensate well. Or, as Robin puts it, I have an "amazingly effective game face". Whatever; I felt good before the tap. Now...things hurt like H E Double Toothpick! It feels like a whole drawer of knives and forks are stuck into my left chest and flank; and let's not even talk about coughing or hiccups!. For the first time ever I actually had to leave work early today because of the pain. Now, granted, I try to limit myself to only four hours on-site, but I have never before had to cut that short (truth be told, I usually stretch it out, much to the consternation of my wife and co-workers!).

Tomorrow is the weekly chemo infusion. Still getting very odd bouts of nausea from it, they come on in a flash and then watch out! Had a mildly humorous bout this weekend; at least I found it funny. My dog, on the other hand, was rather annoyed when I bent down to pet her and she caught a face full of it...Ah well, Sheba needed a bath anyway!

Not much else to report, still waiting for the SoCal doc to get back to us about the referral for the IFN/IL2 therapy. Robin started a support group today, she really enjoyed it and is thinking about cutting her work hours so that she can attend the weekly sessions. The kids are fab, and still have no idea what is up, only that Daddy has a "cold" these last few weeks. Ah, to be six again...

Be well. Read more!

Catching Up

WWFD? Or, What Would Francis Do? Where the heck did that come from, you ask. Well, I gotta admit that this is from an old event, but corporate mail seems to take awhile...

Way back in September I attended a party that was in appreciation for the pivotal figures in our implementation of the computerized medical record. No, I was not a recipient, merely a participant, Any way, during the party I had a chance to talk with a group of the project's nursing reps, and they introduced me to the term "WWFD". Evidently it means "What Would Francis Do?" and it had become their standard approach to any problems that they faced. Needless to say I was 1)Humbled, 2)Honored, 3)Secretly proud, and 4)Irreverent.

The very next weekend my family and I were at the Castro Valley Street Fair and I stumbled across a stall that would create License Plate surrounds on the spot. Needless to say my irreverent side took over and just as a joke I had one created that had "KPHC" across the top and "WWFD" across the bottom.  Well, it turns out that this joke gift I mailed to the project is now posted on the wall of their clinical leader, and photos are floating all over the corporate intranet.  I guess it’s my 15 minutes…

So, on with the updates.  I had the Neck to Nuts CT a bit over three weeks ago.  All of the tumors are stable/shrinking—the ones in the right kidney are now classified as cysts—except for the lung tumors.  Evidently they are multiplying and growing.  The CT also showed a small pleural effusion (fluid pooling in the space between your lung and ribs) at the base of the left lung.  Needless to say my Onc was not happy--nor was I.

As a result of this finding I underwent a Thoracentesis (stick a needle through your chest, feed in a plastic tube, then suck out the fluid) 2 weeks ago.  The results were pretty normal, except for the presence of cancer cells.  On this tap they took out 175cc, not a whole lot.  Unfortunately, one week later I was very short of breath with exertion; so after a chest X-ray I was back in the Interventional Radiology lab where they took out 1700cc of fluid.  When she saw this, the only thing that Robin could say was “wow, ten times the last one”.  Thanks Robin.  Next Tuesday I am due back in IR to see how things are progressing.  As for how I feel, I haven’t felt this good in weeks.  As I used to tell my students, “Air goes in and out, blood goes round and round, oxygen is good”!.

The weirdest part of the experience came when I saw the tube from my back plugged into the vacuum bottle.  It struck me that after about 20 years of assisting on procedures like this—and feeling sorry for the poor bastard that we were treating—now I was the poor bastard being treated.  Very strange feeling.

As a result of the CT scan result and the effusion a bunch of stuff has changed.  First, my chemo has been changed to Temsirolimus; this is similar to Sutent, but is a weekly intravenous infusion which I receive every Wednesday morning.  Also, my Onc has referred my to the Riverside facility that administers the Interferron and Interleukin 2 therapy—with luck we will hear from them next week when their specialist returns to the US.  Pending the results of this referral, and the response of my effusion, the nephrectomy has been put on hold.

Looking back over the last few weeks, I am pretty chagrined to realize that I had no idea what was going on with my lungs.  Like I said earlier, I feel better now than I have in weeks, but a part of me is certain that I should have caught this earlier.  You have no idea what it is like to feel anxious with every breath, weak with every movement, and confused all the time.  And to think that I chalked it up to the side effects from the chemo!  Ah well, live a little, learn a little.

The side effects from the Temsirolimus are pretty limited; most of the effects are zero tolerance for spicy/sour foods and oral sores.  The biggest problem is the nausea and vomiting that hits on the second day after the infusion…yes, that is right now, and the porcelain god has received his due as I type this.  Bloody annoying; and tastes like crap to boot.  With luck it will end tomorrow, and I can get back to eating and drinking.

Well, that is about enough for one night.  Time to go huddle the throne and pray for the morning.

Be well.

Read more!

A Preliminary Reading

Well, today was the Nuclear Bone Scan. For those not used to the terminology, that basically means that I was injected with a material that binds to the active cells in the bones and emits particles that a fancy geiger counter can "see".

Granted, that is a horribly simplified explanation, but it works. The "camera" simply sees radioactive decay particles and plots them. Over time, you end up with an outline of the bones and some other areas. The brighter the area, the more decay particles. The brighter the area, the higher the probability of cells that are running at a fast metabolic rate. Again, a simplification, but it works.

So, on to my reading of the scan. First off, the only reason that I can guess at this is having a bit of the theory, and a bit of experience in seeing these scans--the fruits of many years working in the Emergency Department.

From what I saw, the left Femur (thigh) lesion is confirmed; whether cancer or a bunch of cells fixing a fracture I cannot say. The Kidneys are definitely a hot spot with some funky dark spots on the left. A good friend tells me that the dark areas probably mean that there are dead areas in the left kidney. The other interestingly bright area is in the region of the bladder; not surprising as the nucleotide is cleared by the kidneys and at the end of the test I was desperate to pee ;)

So, all in all, not too bad a scan--as far as I can tell. I'll get back when I see the real reading. Moving forward I am looking at going to the Orthopaedic Oncologist for the femur lesion; and then off to the Urologist for the left kidney removal. With luck this will all happen by the end of January, but I am not looking forward to having a titanium rod shoved into my thigh. Ah well, what is, will be.

On the chemo front the side effects are not too bad this time. The GI stuff is a bit of a bother, but seems better today.

Not too much on the home front; we are looking forward to tramping thru the forest this weekend and picking out a Christmas tree. With a bit of luck we will even manage to get it decorated this weekend. Speaking of that, what in the world do they tell kids now a days? My daughter is deathly afraid that a "real" tree will catch on fire, and that says that we have to get a "fake" tree. Ah, don't get me started. They can't sing Silent Night at their Winter Festival, but they can sing O Hannukah. Yet another symptom that the Judeo-Christian origins of the US are being sundered, and the States are dead. All hail the Politically Correct interpretation of (dis) reality!

Anyway, enough depressing stuff. Today was a good day. I am alive, the family is alive, and we are all healthy.

Two quick notes. For those who have been reading this blog, I have good news and bad news about some of the people that I have mentioned.

Last week my Aunt Noelle passed from this earth. She fought a long and valiant fight against some disease that they still cannot diagnose. She was a wonderful person and has enriched the lives of all of us that knew her. Noelle, I will miss you. Say hello to momma for me.

As for my office mate, he is doing well, and evidently living without a kidney is not too bad. According to all of the work-ups he has no metastases and should be fine. Let this be so.

Please pray for them both during this holiday season.

Be well, and remember that it is the little things that count. Read more!

Thanksgiving Update

First, let me be the first to wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving. Many of us get so wrapped up in our lives, and the sheer commercialism of this time of year, that I think it is wise that we all sit back and reflect on the true meaning of this Holiday.

And what is Thanksgiving about? For me it is a time to remember all the blessings and benefits that we all have in our lives. A time to share those thanks, and whatever else I can, with family and friends. Some of us have more, some of us have less, but we all have something to share and to be thankful for. For myself, I am mainly just thankful for the fact that I am alive and relatively healthy, and that I am blessed with one of the best family's around. Both blood and "adopted". I truly could not be going through this so easily without the support of all. Thank you.

Now, on to the update stuff. Today I went to see the Onc, and to get another infusion of the "Bone Juice". My doc--and the whole team--are quite happy with my current situation. The current plan is to resume the chemo on next Tuesday, and after the cycle is over to run a complete battery of tests. So sometime in early January I will have another set of Brain and Spine MRI's, as well as the neck to nuts CT. After the tests are done I will be off to RWC and Stanford for my follow up appointments for the Craniotomy and CyberKnife. Also, after the tests I will be scheduled for the removal of my primary tumor. Yep, time for the Radical Nephrectomy (Kidney removal)! Seems kinda odd to be excited about another surgery, but I like the idea of treatment progressing. The only drawback is that I will have to be off work again for a few weeks. Ah well, I don't know anyone who died of boredom; so I doubt that I will.

Hopefully the next few days will not be as rough as after the last bone juice infusion; but what will be, will be. The Onc team all had some ideas to try out, so I am hopefully applying their suggestions.

Turkey day should be pretty quiet; we have some friends and my brother bringing food and spending the day with us, so that will be a big help. Of course, stubborn cuss that I am, I insisted on cooking the turkey, stuffing, and gravy. So, come hell or high water, that is what I will do. Besides, I did most of it today. All that is left is plopping the bird on the barbeque or into the oven...

Last of all, I have a special request. A good friend of mine--he stood with me when few would--recently underwent surgery and the pathology report came back this week. Turns out the two of us have another thing in common; we both have Renal Cell Carcinoma. His prognosis is rather better than mine--thank God they found it relatively early. Anyway, I am sure that he and his wife and kids would benefit from your prayers as much as me and mine have, so please remember him.

Thanks again to all of you; and remember that Thanksgiving is about sharing your bounty and being thankful for what you have. Sometimes a hard thing to do, and this year has been harder than most, but I am positive that we all have at least one thing to be thankful for. For myself, many more that one.

Be well. Read more!

Cyberknife and More...

TV commercials suck. The last thing that I want to watch is the latest Viagra or Tampax ad, especially when the kids are watching TV with me. Ever try to answer a six year old when they ask "Daddy, what's a tampon?"!

Since I hate commercials I tend to watch many of the shows from the DVR recording; that way I can tap the button I programmed for a 30 second skip and just bounce past the offensive interludes. Why bring this up? Well, last week I saw--for the first time that I can remember--one of the KP Thrive commercials and it really hit home. The scene is set by a young lady going about town, talking about how she has cancer. The tag line for the ad is "I have cancer, it does not have me." Great attitude, and one that I will have to remember.

Friday was Cyberknife treatment one; they did the spine only. Yesterday was treatment two (spine and brain), and today is treatment three (spine and brain again). Robin tells me that the CK team says I am their most relaxed patient yet...huh, all I do is try to sleep through it! What else is there to do when you have to hold perfectly still for one hour and are strapped into a cradle or mask to ensure compliance? Watch a fancy welding robot move about and spit Xrays at you? Boring. (Yesterday the CK tech discovered my secret--she came in at the end of the brain frying and had to wake me up.)

Side effects from the CK treatments are pretty manageable. Mostly just fatigue/lassitude and a touch of nausea. These generally hit around one hour after the treatment. Yesterday I was feeling pretty good and a bit adventurous, so we stopped and got dome food on the way home. Note to self: Fried McDonalds food and CK treatments do not mix well. I ended up missing dinner (a gorgeous steak) and spent the evening praying for my stomach to chill out. Joy.

Initially the CK scheduler had the majority of my treatments scheduled for the mid afternoon--which caused much whining from me due to travel and rush hour--but they have so far managed to reschedule every one to earlier in the day. Today's appointment is now in its third iteration, as we have to be there by 1130am. Just goes to show, whining can help! Plays havoc with Robin's scheduling back-up for her clinic though. I must say, her boss and the staffers have been absolutely stellar through this whole thing. Thanks ladies!

Not much from the Sutent this time around. The reflux can still be pretty bad--that and the steroids they are giving me as part of the CK treatment are why I am up so early--but not much else thus far.

Had a friend drop by for the afternoon on Sunday, so we spent the time kibitzing about our old employer and generally catching up. Great fun and a good morale booster. Hey, in case any of you forgot, it's the little things that help. I am also told that the prayer circle has grown again; thanks Mary and Laura!

Well, time to go. About time to wake up the house and do the Daddy thing.

Take care. Read more!

From the Bedside

Had a nice day. The staff here have been wonderful. Just the right mix of attentiveness and letting me do things for myself.

Robin and my father spent a few hours visiting with me this am. My brother also dropped by with an order of Pad Thai on his lunch. That hit the spot! Talking about food; either we have changed suppliers, or the steroids are really messing with me, as the food is not too bad.

Recovery goes well. Some visual disturbances in the right hand fields, but they were expected and not too bad. I find I need my reading glasses to accomplish anything. Good thing I relented and brought them along. Up and about most of the afternoon after the Neurosurgeon came by and gave his OK for the removal of all the various appliances that were plugged into me. Since then I have been basically up and about and left to my own devices. Not free yet, but getting there. Speaking of freedom, I am scheduled for discharge to home tomorrow morning. All we need is the final clearance from the covering Surgeon.

Just finished up with a group of co-workers who came across the Bay after work to drop in. Thanks Guys! It was great to see and talk with you!

Well, time for my evening constitutional. At least I can see the places where I "grew up" outside the windows. Not as good as being there, but still helps this place feel less foreign.

Take care.

Read more!

UCSF Consult and Getting Ready For Thursday

Well, Monday we had the consult at UCSF. Nothing much new or unexpected. Given the tumor status, my primary ONC seems to be charting the proper path, and we are moving as well as can be expected. I had been pushing for a visit with the Surgical ONC, but their Tumor Group decided to start me out with the Medical ONC, so there we started. Man, the paperwork they wanted! Being out of the fee-for-service side of things for 10 years or so, I had forgotten what it was like. Ah well, at least I can remember all the hoops that I had to jump through for for a STAT transfer from the ER to UCSF; that gave me a recent perspective to work from. ER transfers are easy compared to this!

Most of the encounter was training working with the Fellow who was partnered with the UCSF Urology ONC Clinic Doctor/Professor. Been a bit since I worked with an "adolescent" doc. Kind of fun. Didn't realize how much it could amuse me, nor how much I missed it. In the end the Fellow got it right (only 3 or 4 trips to the exam room to examine me. God, were we all like that as students and "fresh meat"?), and then the UCSF doc came in to review the findings and discuss the care with us.

Had a couple of fun moments with the ONC and the Fellow. Mainly around talking about philosophy of care--I described mine as "scorched earth" and wanting to be aggressive. The Fellow got rather pale at that phrase, but the doc seemed to get it. He certainly loosened up, and talked about how it would be nice to be able to do the Craniotomy and the Nephrectomy (Kidney removal) at the same time; so I passed on how I had asked the Neuro folks if they could invite a Urologist in to assist for the procedure on Thursday. The doc chuckled, the Fellow tensed; and Robin chimed in with "He's serious". Then the UCSF doc apologized for being a bit of a "cowboy" and looked rather wistful. I think he enjoyed the banter a bit.

Most of the information was about clinical trials currently at UCSF and also coming down the pike. He also related the latest stats for Sutent (5% Complete Response), and Interferon/Interleukin-2 (about 8-11% Complete Response). Looks like the long term goal of IFN/IL2 is still the best option, which might mean a road trip to Riverside for a consult. Have to look for something closer and push for it. Being away for a week at a time would be very hard on the kids. Screw staying in the "system" if it means hardship for Robin and the kids. BTW, for the non-medical readers, "Complete Response" = Cure. Everything else is just window dressing and "buying time".

Tomorrow we are taking the kids to the beach to play and tell them about the surgery in a relaxed setting. This task duty scares me more than anything else that I have ever done. Not the surgery mind you--that is just a small burr hole, a quick swipe with a router, a bit of cutting and scooping, close it up and drive in four screws to keep everything closed--no fear there. No, sitting the kids down and telling them enough to set them at ease, but not enough to scare the crap out of them. That will be hard. Terrifies me. Robin and I talked it out, we have a plan, and God will show us the way--or hopefully knock me upside the head when it is time to shut up and be "Just Dad" instead of "Nurse Dad". Thank God they saw the wound and the sutures from the initial excision on my scalp. They both thought that it looked "cool" (Oh, to be six again); and it gives them/us a made to order baseline for the explanation.

Found out an interesting tidbit today when we finally took the paperwork in to the bank to convert all our accounts to the Family Trust; it seems that a Trust cannot have and Overdraft Line of Credit on bank accounts. At least, not at WaMu. Ah well, we have structured everything as best we can, and now all is in the Trust name, so the kids are protected as best we can. That is the important thing.

The rest of the last few days have been nice, we spent some time at the Castro Valley Fair and the Renaissance Fair. Did a bit of walking and spending; ate way too much, spent way too much, and bought a few presents for friends and family. Fair warning to Lisa, Ashley and the KPHC crew: I found something to immortalize your "WWFD?" comments and it is in the mail to you. Don't worry ladies, it is fairly cute--at least I think so--and the rest of you will learn more later. I have a picture and the full story to post after the present makes it to E'ville.

Let's see, what else? Books and toys are picked out for the stay in RWC. The WiFi does not seem to be built out yet, so the work laptop stays at home. Connectivity/Web/Something To Do will be limited to the Netbook, iPod and PocketPC phone. That's OK. With those three devices I can get into worlds of trouble fun; and, if nothing else, hack my way into just about anything that interests me. Might be fun to RAS my way into the lab results on my PPC phone and check out the results before/as the nurses get them. Haven't done that in a bit. Have to find out if I remember how. Worst comes to worse, I will be able to use my PPC phone to update the blog and send out an "All clear" for the family and friends. Certainly easier than individual emails; and I just might be able to add a picture or two of the wound. Ooh, goody! Scalp porn!

Contact updates for the week are quite full. A couple of friends from high school found my profile on Facebook and contacted me. Great to hear from them. I really should be writing to them instead of typing this, but I felt the need to vent. Also ran into an old friend: To Bill and the Diablo NSG folks--I miss you all, and it has been great to hear from you.

Well, time to take a walk and crash. Oh, that reminds me. One of my favorite authors is Jerry Pournelle. He has written for many fields, including Science Fiction, the National Space Advisory Council and various computer publications. I have been following his writing for about thirty years, and over the last year Jerry has been blogging about his experiences with a Brain Tumor and hnis treatment at SoCal Kaiser facilities. Many great observations and insights into the whole process of cancer diagnosis, treatment, and recovery. Who would have thought that his experiences would be helping me now?! Anyway, his blog is at www.jerrypournelle.com and is titled Chaos Manor In Perspective. The rason a walk reminds me of him is that one of his tricks for fighting the steroid manis is taking a walk--as long as you can--before you go to bed. I find it is working. The meds just give me nightmares and I wake up in a cold sweat.

Be well. Back soon.

Read more!

And The Winner Is...

The traditional scalpel and the Cyberknife!

Robin and I spent a long and fruitful day in Redwood City on Thursday consulting with the Neuroscience team (a fabulous group BTW). The approach that we have settled on is a Craniotomy (next Thursday 9/18) to go in and remove the tumor. After a suitable wait of 10 to 14 days then I will be off to the Cyberknife facility for a thorough nuking of the tumor bed (e.g. the place where the tumor used to sit). The hope is that this will remove everything that we can see. Then off to MRI every 2 to 3 months to watch and see.

Depending on whom I talk to, the hospital stay will be 2 to 4 days. Of course, back when I had my Laminectomy done I was such a pain that after only 45 minutes on the unit the nurses were stumbling all over each other to contact the surgeon and get me discharged...so much for the projected stay of 6 to 8 hours for that! A good patient I am generally not!

That brings me to the big issue of the day. The kids. They still don't know everything that is going on--although my son told me that it was good to see me eating again--but they are starting to get that something is up. Wednesday we are going to keep them out of school and sit them down for a simple talk about Daddy's short stay in the Hospital. Then Robin and I will spend the day with them and try to keep calm.

I am not sure how we will be handling the long term follow-up and treatment for the brain mets. The possible and probable side effects of whole brain radiation frankly scare the piss out of Robin and I. I kinda like my brain functioning in a (mostly) un-demented state. For know, we will hold off on nuking eveything in sight, especially given the fsct that RCC is one of the most radiation resistant tumors out there.

We also had an appointment with the Med ONC today to go over the CT results. We are both happy with them, so I will be restarting the Sutent ASAP. That will have to be coordinated with the Neursurgeon and the Neuro ONC after the surgery, so the better news is that I get to eat properly for a few more weeks! More long term we are now looking at removing the primary after the Neurosuurgery, but will probably have to do 2 cycles of Sutent first.

Speaking of eating, a friend had dinner delivered to us Thursday night; boy did that save us. We had expected to be home to the East Bay by 2pm at the latest. Instead we rolled in the door around 530 and the food was here within minutes. Thanks again Lynn!

Man, but these roids are pissing me off! The regurge is just a pain and the emotional swings are driving me bonkers. Robin keeps telling me that I am talking and acting like somebody wired on crank. Maybe she's right. After all, I am typing this up at 350 in the am! About the only good part to the Decadron has been the massive return of my appetite. Not sure how many calories I have gone through this week, but all of the 7 lost pounds are back (and then some). I find that I need to eat a full meal about every 4 hours or I get rather cranky and the regurge gets bothersome. I wonder if this is how the holly-weird types bounce their weight up for their roles? And my impulse control! Look out! Anything is always a good idea, screw the thoughts of consequences. Ah well, this too shall pass.

Robin and I are off to UCSF on Monday. Their Urological Oncology team has discussed the case and they want to start us off with their Medical ONC first. Yet another day spent in a clinic...But it is for a good cause. Knowledge is always power.

The family is all coming a-running next week. I am so grateful for everything that they and our friends are doing for us. It looks like we will have someone here every day for 5 or 6 days to help Robin with the kids and stuff, so that is a great relief to me. And, I am sure, to her.

What else to mention? Is it a good day today? Well duh, you're breathing still aren't ya?

I think I'll just leave it at this: Most of us walk through life without realizing the effects that we have on the other people around us. I count myself as one of those people, as I can be rather oblivious at times. The last three days have given me the opportunity to read and learn about the effects that I have had on some of the people around me. For that I am deeply grateful, very humbled, and damned proud of each and every one of you. You were, and are, the best of the best. I miss you all.

Be well. Time to try and catch a couple more hours sleep. Busy day with the family coming up.
Read more!

Damnation!

I was going to talk about some other stuff today, but somehow I have lost the motivation for that. Just got a call from the Onc. The MRI showed a 1cm lesion in the left parietal and some associated swelling. They also found a 2 or 3mm area that "might" be a recent bleed or a calcification. Oh joy. I am to start Decadron tomorrow morning. The doc is also putting in consults with a Radiation Onc and a Neurosurgeon.

Needless to say Robin and I are not in a great space right now.

Thanks to the team from work today for lunch. It was great seeing all of you!
Read more!

End of the First Round

It has been quite a day. I took the last dose of the first cycle of Sutent this morning. Now I get to look forward to the gradual decrease of the side effects and about 10 days being able to eat. I intend to gorge myself.

I had pretty much resigned myself to watching a boring Presidential race, with two teams of Senators--none of whom have any sort of Executive experience--trying to out do each other. Boy was I wrong! Saw the speech by Sarah Palin this am. She Rocks! I have a feeling that she will upset many apple carts before this is all over... At least now there will be someone who actually has done things, rather than telling others how to do things!

Did anyone catch the immediate response by the Obama crowd? “Today, John McCain put the former mayor of a town of 9,000 with zero foreign policy experience a heartbeat away from the presidency.” Last I looked, the only way she could be put a "heartbeat" away from the Presidency would be for McCain to be the President, not just a candidate. So, does that mean that the Obama campaign has conceeded defeat? Or, that they just can not write using proper english...

I also find it interesting that their first response makes it seem that towns of 9,000 do not count for anything. Last time I looked there were more small towns in america than large towns. Careful whom you insult Barack, your words may come back to bite you!

As for the foreign policy experience, let's see. So far we have 3 Senators--they get to vote on treaties, not make treaties. Their committees get to vote on appropriations, not decide the policies and priorities that determine the appropriation requests. Let's see, that primarily makes their experience that of saying "Yes" or "No" to other people's decisions on both foreign AND domestic policy. On the other hand, we have the Governor of the one state in the Union whose only land border is with a foreign country. One of only two states in the union that shares no borders with the "Lower 48". Seems to me that Sarah potentially has more experience dealing with foreign nations--especially on matters of trade and energy policy--than all three of the other candidates combined!

On to other news of the day. The mouth is much better today, no Benadryl since last noc and it is still getting better. The work gang sent me a "bouquet" of balloons congratulating me on completing the first round of the Sutent (THANKS Guys!). We are looking forward to going to Penn Valley this weekend for our nephew's birthday.

Enjoy the holiday.
Read more!

A Good Night

I actually managed to eat all of my dinner tonight. Not up to my usual 2000 to 3000 calories, but getting there. I probably hit about 1200. And no Zantac today! Woohoo!

I also got a letter from another old friend. Today has turned into a good day.

Hey, like I keep saying, it's the little things.
Read more!

My Head is a Dangerous Place

My low back has been killing me for the last couple of days. Now, most rational people with a history of spinal surgery would attribute the pain to their son running into their low back at full speed--Robin says it is the first time she ever saw me turn grey--but do I? No. It is mets. It can only be mets, and it is going to kill me right now.

Aargh! This is not fun.

OK, side effect check for the day: energy levels suck. Everything still tastes weird, mainly like cardboard or battery acid with a dollop of metal added for spice. Speaking of spice, hot foods hurt! Even the mildest of Jalapenos is beyond me right now. Eating is possible, but rarely enjoyable.

Got a couple of cards from the folks at work today. In all my years of passing cards for other people at work I never dreamed that I would be the recipient of some. Like I keep telling people when I thank them for cards and such, it is the little things that help. Thanks for the thoughts and prayers.
Read more!

Best Wishes

I received a couple of cards today and yesterday, two for Masses for the sick (it's a Catholic thing) and one get well card from a friend. It looks like folks on at least two continents are praying for my family and I. Thanks, we truly do appreciate it.

I have also had some emails over the last week from family and friends, and just want to acknowledge these as well. Thanks.

On Tuesday we finalize the Family Trust and meet with the Genetics Counsellor. We are going to rule out Von-Hippel Lindau disease.
Read more!

Friends Helping Friends

A friend of ours at the hospital heard about the MRI need and managed to get us on the schedule for today, so the MRI is already done. Yeah! Now all we need is a reading so that the Onc can pick a treatment plan. Also had the LDH and other labs drawn while at the hospital.

I've had many MRI's of my spine over the years, but today's was the hardest. For some reason I basically lost it in the scanner. It just got into my head that the inside of the tube looked like a coffin, and that I was going to be buried alive and no one would notice it. Suddenly, I just had to leave, and I mean right now. My chest got tight, I couldn't breathe; it was awful This all hit about halfway through the test, and when the tech mentioned that we would soon be ready to inject and redo the scans I almost hauled my butt out of the tube then and there. I managed to hold it somewhat together for the next 10 minutes of the scan, and then the tech came on the intercom and said that the radiologist had decided not to do a contrast study. My god, I almost cried when they pulled me out of the tube.

I will never, ever, get into a MRI again without sedation. I can still close my eyes and feel the walls of the tube squeezing me out of existence...
Read more!